


Closure

by an7romeda



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Bittersweet, Complete, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Last Kiss, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-28
Updated: 2016-02-28
Packaged: 2018-05-23 20:10:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,280
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6128680
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/an7romeda/pseuds/an7romeda
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"When Shepard wanted to retreat to that cold stoic brand of soldier, Samantha wrapped her arms around Shepard and reminded her exactly why she fought so hard. When the world went wrong, Samantha made sense."</p><p>Screw professionalism, Traynor and Shepard deserved one last goodbye before the Normandy took off.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Closure

The world was on fire. There was no heat yet ash and smoke chokes the Earth. Every breath burned with the inhalation of smoke and debris. Every step was onto hot coals. Every move was a dull burn. A reminder from her neglected body that instinct and adrenaline would eventually run her body dry. The burn was a welcome distraction from the hollow ache echoing through Shepard’s bones. Her body longed for comfort, a rest, and she knew her time was coming.

Charging to the conduit didn’t go as planned. The reaper’s beams almost knocked her down a few times but she was able to continue. Her teammates weren’t so lucky. There wasn’t much of a chance to warn them of the oncoming mako. All she could do was run back and call the Normandy for a pick up.

Shepard tried to ignore the setback of an injured comrade. She thought of all the drinks they’d thrown back to forget the ache and the only relief she’d ever found. She yearned for the morning haze where she latched onto Samantha for warmth and they whispered confessions to one another.  But she knew better than to get caught up in sweet thoughts.

Shepard returned to her ship for the last time with her wounded companions. Shepard swallowed hard at that thought. She said she would come back for Samantha, she didn’t like to lie but in that moment, she couldn’t say what they both knew was true.

The three soldiers stood on the Normandy’s bridge. Shepard instructed them to board and to leave her to end this once and for all.

Her friends—companions—soldiers argue to go with her. They all promised to follow her to the end. She stood behind her orders. No sense in sacrificing their lives, someone had to live to see this galaxy bloom again.

One last time, Shepard, locked eyes with her companions. Shepard inhaled sharply as her salute touched her brow. On her tongue danced a number of final words, ‘it’s been a good ride’ or a classic ‘take care’. She exhaled a long even breath to keep back the tears, this was her crew, her ship, and most likely the last she’d ever see either.

Their protests were wordless. Their eyes searching hers. It was selfish to ask her to stay but it was agonizing to let her sacrifice herself…again. The formalities between them were broken, if there were even any to begin with. A salute was too formal and a hug was too emotional. Instead, the soldiers memorize their mentor—their friend—with withered eyes and breaking hearts.

“Stay safe.” She said finally and motioned for the medic crew to tend to her wounded companions. She stared inside the bay and she swallowed hard. How easy would it be to spend the last moments of the world here? How hard it was to turn around and end this alone?

She turned back to the battlefield and scanned the scene. She had to make it to The Conduit. That’s all that mattered. Before she could move, a commotion begins behind her. Her solemn thoughts interrupted by the sound of the elevator doors opening and hurried footsteps against the ground. Shepard turned around and focused on the crowd parting as the footsteps grow closer.

“Shepard!” Samantha Traynor shouted as she ran full speed towards the Normandy’s ajar door. Her heavy heart lifting at the sound of Samantha’s voice.

“Samantha.” Shepard found herself smiling despite the situation and rushed deeper into the Normandy.

Samantha crashed into Shepard’s arms. Although Shepard was a bit surprised, she instinctively wrapped her arms around Samantha’s waist into a firm embrace. Samantha relished in this small feat of seeing her love one last time. Reminding herself that the crew making it this far was a victory in itself.

Samantha pressed her body closer to Shepard. “I thought I’d…”

“Did you come to wish me luck, Specialist?” Shepard chuckled but it barely reached her lips, much less her eyes. Shepard sighed. “It’s not over yet. You should—”

“Yes, yes, I will get back to safety, as soon as we’re done.” Samantha finished.

Shepard smirked. “Good.”

Their lighthearted chat was short-lived. Their faces fell quickly as they realized the weight of this encounter. Samantha searched Shepard’s face. Shepard’s expression, as the moment, was bittersweet. The thoughts of the words she wanted to say twisted her expression. Samantha’s thumb softly rubbed a scar along her lover’s jaw despite her trembling hands. There weren’t any fresh cuts or wounds, Samantha noted positively. Shepard was still breathing and uninjured that was another victory—no—that was, as Shepard would say, a god damn miracle.

“Listen, I know this was selfish and reckless but…” She shook her head as if to refocus her thoughts. “I just had to see you.” She swallowed the lump in her throat and continued. “To…remind you that I’m not letting you off the hook.” She mustered a weak giggle. “You can’t just promise a girl a life with you if you…”

Samantha couldn’t bring herself to finish. Samantha stood on her tip toes and pulled her in to close the gap between them. Ignoring the tears burning in the corners of her eyes, Samantha squeezed her eyes closed to shut out the world around them. All her attention was on memorizing the taste in the blaze of battle. The kiss was unlike any of the others they had. Shepard’s lips were rough both in texture and technique but her mouth was still the same warmth Samantha could never take for granted. A beautiful moment in the chaos but this couldn’t be where their story ended. She wouldn’t have it.

When Shepard wanted to retreat to that cold stoic brand of soldier, Samantha wrapped her arms around Shepard and reminded her exactly why she fought so hard. When the world went wrong, Samantha made sense.

Samantha was home.

Shepard always kissed goodbye like it was the end of the world, that tinge of ‘just in case I don’t come back, here’s something to remember me by’. After all, Shepard knew all too well how fast things could end and somehow she still felt like it wasn’t enough.

When their lips parted, they lingered for a moment with their foreheads touching and wrapped in one another’s arm. Too soon, Shepard took a step back and pulled the dogs tags from under her armor’s collar.

She held them in the palm of her hand and kissed the tags, “For you.” She placed the tags in Samantha’s hand and wrapped them around it.

“Shepard, I…” Samantha shook her head as she tried to hand it back. This was Shepard’s identity, as much as she wanted to, Samantha couldn’t keep it. “You can’t leave without…”

"Keep them…please” Shepard tenderly closed Samantha’s hand around her dog tags. “I’ll come home and retrieve them.” Shepard said with a final kiss against Samantha’s forehead. “That’s a promise.”

The antagonizing call of the Reapers consumed the world’s atmosphere. Shepard released her hand and smiled solemnly at Samantha. A soldier began to pull Samantha back on the ship.  

“Go! Do us proud!” Samantha called. Shepard smiled and saluted.

Samantha watched her warrior charge into battle, straight into the mouth of the beast. As a voice gave Joker the all-clear for lift-off, she hurried to the elevator to return to her position.

As the elevator doors closed, Samantha tried hard to control her trembling lips and watery eyes. She pressed the tags to her heart and took a few deep breaths. With her composure regained, she returned to her station as the singular steady voice in the Alliance frequencies.


End file.
